So I've been thinking I know absolutely nothing about babies. I'm the baby in my family so I was never really around any. Yes I have lots of younger cousins, but thats the thing I know toddlers and up well. Give me a baby though and I'm clueless. Really I mean totally clueless. Yes, I know the motherly instinct supposedly just kicks in, but still I have no idea what I'm in for. I just feel like I'm floating around in a sea of the unknown....

Life....you never know how fast things in your life can change. As most know I've had a lot of change lately....I've lost a lot, but yet I've gained even more and I'm not just talking about my rambunctious yet to be born baby girl. I'm talking about how I have learned a lot about myself things I may not have learned for years if I hadn't gotten pregnant. Its interesting how your priorities change and just you change when you have a baby on the way (or when you have any major life change). Even though as most know I will be raising this baby as a single mom I know that I wont be alone I have the support of so many family and friends that I know will be always willing to help. The way I look at it I feel lucky to have so many people who are there for me. It's not like I have no job or health insurance. I am lucky that I'm in such a good situation.

I think some people think they need to tiptoe around the fact that I don't have a husband, but really they don't it's a fact I don't have one so why dwell over it. Sure I'd love to have a significant other to share this with, but I don't so why cry over split milk? I don't mean to sound bitter I just have learned to be practical about it. Not to say I don't have some sad times, but there must be some reason why I became pregnant so I feel no regrets..........On to other topics. Labor and delivery....yeah maybe I'm not ready yet to talk about that. I'm just gonna go into it knowing its going to involve pain, but yet it wont last forever right? I talked to a girl at the bank last weekend who had an epidural with her first child and her leg was numb for three years until she had her next child and the epidural again where it reversed the effect. Weird huh? Freaked me out and she said she found that its not abnormal for things like that to happen. I do know that I DO NOT want to be induced. I have heard from so many of my friends that it is horrible.....Time to go..... :P